Kaepernick Just Woke To WORST ‘Present’ Today On His Birthday – This Is The Best Thing Ever

Every week that Colin Kaepernick’s phone doesn’t ring with a multi-million dollar offer to come play football, the third-string quarterback’s ego (that’s even bigger than his hair) keeps getting savagely chipped away at. Kaepernick has tried all summer to lure a sucker into signing him, as he continues to push his ridiculous sob story about his unemployment being due to the NFL being some sort of “racist” organization against blacks. After two months of playing left seat cushion on his living room couch and likely drowning his sorrows in a bag of Cheetos, the final death blow to both Kaepernick’s and ego and career has just come from an unlikely source, that’s just in time for his birthday, which is today.

After getting the royal snub from dozens of teams during the preseason, Kaepernick was holding out hope that the Jacksonville Jaguars would finally offer him a job to come play on their team. But the Jacksonville Jaguars’ decided to sign Blake Bortles as their new quarterback instead, who doesn’t even possess the skills necessary to throw a Frisbee into a lake if he was standing on the shoreline.

Kaepernick’s hopes to finally get signed to a team were again renewed this week after learning that the Houston Texans had lost their quarterback Deshaun Watson to a season-ending injury after Watson tore his right ACL. But to add insult to injury, the Houston Texans decided to pick an experienced quarterback to fill Watson’s place on the team, leaving Kaepernick unemployed yet again, and livid to boot.

After getting the royal snub from dozens of teams during the preseason, Kaepernick was holding out hope that the Jacksonville Jaguars would finally offer him a job to come play on their team. But the Jacksonville Jaguars’ decided to sign Blake Bortles as their new quarterback instead, who doesn’t even possess the skills necessary to throw a Frisbee into a lake if he was standing on the shoreline.

Kaepernick’s hopes to finally get signed to a team were again renewed this week after learning that the Houston Texans had lost their quarterback Deshaun Watson to a season-ending injury after Watson tore his right ACL. But to add insult to injury, the Houston Texans decided to pick an experienced quarterback to fill Watson’s place on the team, leaving Kaepernick unemployed yet again, and livid to boot.

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